It seems like many of the mothers and grandmothers I've known growing up, found a need to cut articles from newspapers or magazines and send them to their children or friends. I suppose this is like that. Just with a different media and no one in particular to send it to.

I thought this site might be a good way to present my thoughts on the world inside my head. It is supposed to contain all the things that go unsaid. A way to vent. I am not sure it's turning out to be the solution I have been looking for. Although, I do not think it is the fault of the media I'm using.

I believe it is my lack of typing it out...well here it goes.

Recently, I listened to "Into the Wild" by John Krakauer. I had read it maybe 20 years ago and it left an impression on me. Listening to it while laying brick pavers, it seems to have a different meaning than it did when I first read it. Or maybe I've forgot many of the details from the book. John Krakauer makes a comparison of Chris McCandless to other famous people that a driven to wander, such as John Muir. I feel like he paints these people as starry-eyed with a direct path that would be unthinkable, if not physically painful, to not heed its call. I do not think I come across these people in my day to day living so I have an impression that something has been discovered, which is total bullshit. Perhaps it's more that this group of people never have their story told. Without knowing McCandless, or people like him, I do not think I can see how he may have stood out. Also, is it irony that he gave his life savings away to OXFAM and died of starvation? Irony ofthen escapes me.

Today, I was wondering if I have an impending dead-dear-wrecked-car in my future. If so, that means every moment I have lived and made some decision would have brought me to that incident. I thought that I may be able to avoid it altogether if I randomly delay taking a step or suddenly stop from time to time. Or maybe doing so would cause me to have the accident. I suppose that might dictate if I am a good person or not. Or lucky or not. To me a good person would be not to kill a deer with an automobile. Some people may have a different opinion.